Jeff & Beth’s Adoption Story

My Birthmother Story

It all began with a phone call from our Adoptive Parent Counselor and these words: “Hi, this is Robyn. I’ve got a situation that I’d like to talk to you about.” But wait… it didn’t all begin there… it began before that with an Orientation Meeting at Adoption Minnesota.

From the minute we walked into Adoption Minnesota, we knew that we were in the right place. We had visited other agencies, but none of them felt right, none of them felt like “us.” A friend of a friend told us about Adoption Minnesota. She had adopted her daughter through them and said so many positive things, we knew we had to check them out.

At the Orientation Meeting we were greeted warmly by the staff and got the feeling everyone there knew what we were going through. At that first meeting we were informed about the adoption process and the services that Adoption Minnesota could provide. We walked out excited and nervous about the road ahead. We had so many questions and concerns, but we knew that we could turn to the people at Adoption Minnesota for help.

After the initial meeting, we had our “homestudy” and worked with our Adoptive Parent Counselor to complete the paperwork and the meeting that the state mandates. We have to say we were quite nervous through the entire process… would we say the right thing… was our house good enough… will any birth parent choose us? But with every meeting we attended and every phone call we made our anxieties were quieted. Our Counselor knew how to make us feel comfortable and made us aware that our feelings were normal and we didn’t have to worry.

After we completed our “home study” we worked with another counselor to discuss our adoption plan, how to talk to birth parents, and what to expect. After going into the Adoptive Parent Profile book, we began to meet every 4 to 6 weeks with our study group. The other families in our group were at the same stage as us …waiting for a phone call from a birth parent. A counselor attended our first several meetings. At one of them we got to listen to a birth mother tell her side of the adoption story. We would discuss our feelings, what we should do when we got a phone call, and what to look forward to after that.

We never did receive a call from a birth parent. We did, however, receive phone calls from Adoption Minnesota for three separate situations. Adoption Minnesota needed to “screen” us because there were issues to consider.

The first birth parents were seeking a very open adoption. They wanted to visit the baby for some time after the adoption took place. After a meeting with them and several conversations with our counselor, we decided the situation wasn’t right for us. We later learned that the birth parents made the right match with another lucky couple.

The second situation was similar to the first. The third situation, however, was a little different and turned out to be our match! Our “waiting” time took only five months. We were very lucky and blessed. We couldn’t be happier!

We have to say that everyone at Adoption Minnesota, the Counselors, the people who spoke to our study group, and even those we spoke to on the phone overwhelmed us with their compassion, understanding and empathy. From the anxious phone calls that we made to our Counselor, to the wise words of advice that we received from other “seasoned” staff, we knew that we were not going through the process alone.

We still get choked up when we tell people about our “phone call” and the great people we worked with. We have recommended Adoption Minnesota to countless people, some friends and some people we don’t even know. We also still call the people from Adoption Minnesota and attend the gatherings they have for adoptive families.

We can’t express our feelings about Adoption Minnesota and its people adequately. They made it possible for us to get through the process and the wait, during one of the most important times of our lives. They became our confidants and our friends. I know they will do the same for you!