November is National Adoption Month

The History of November being National Adoption Month began in 1976 in Massachusetts when Governor Michael Dukakis announced an Adoption Week. This was then proclaimed as National Adoption Week by President Reagan in 1984. It was in 1995 that National Adoption Week’s awareness and time span was expanded to an entire month by President Clinton.

Adoption is an important, beautiful, and incredible option. National Adoption Month is a month that people use to celebrate and reflect on how their lives have been impacted by adoption. It also provides a platform for spreading awareness of adoption-related news and issues.

Looking to Give Your Baby up for Adoption?

Looking to give your baby up for adoption?

Here are 6 steps you may take if you have an unplanned pregnancy and want to work with a private adoption agency:

  1. Deciding adoption is right for you and your baby:

Before even starting the process of “giving a baby up” for adoption, you must take time to learn about the process and if adoption is right for you and your baby/child. Adoption Minnesota is a licensed adoption agency, who explains this process and works with women to educate them on adoption in a non-judging or pressuring way. We believe that you can’t make a decision about giving up your baby until you have all the facts.

  1. Create a private adoption plan for your baby:

At Adoption Minnesota we help you with your unplanned pregnancy. You can create a plan of how you want your adoption to go. You are in control and get to make many of the decisions about how you want the process to go. You get to decide how to go about putting your baby up for adoption in a way that you are comfortable with.

You will be assigned a counselor who will explain your options and go over what you are looking for in a family. They will help you create a hospital plan for labor and delivery along with a plan for openness or ongoing contact after placement.

  1. Choosing an Adoptive Family for your baby:

At Adoption Minnesota we feel that finding an adoptive family that you feel comfortable with is one of the most important parts to placing your baby for adoption. We know how much you love your baby, and therefore it is so important to find a family that you feel is a perfect fit.

All the families at the adoption agency have completed a home study and background checks to ensure they are stable, fully prepared to adopt, and will provide a safe home full of love for an adopted child.

You will be given the opportunity to go through all of our families and get to know them through emails, texts, phone calls and in person visits. Once you have chosen the family that you would like to place with, Adoption Minnesota helps you finish planning the rest of the adoption plan. With a private adoption agency like Adoption Minnesota, you are the one in charge when creating the adoption plan and giving up your baby.

  1. Give Birth/Delivery

The hospital experience will be planned out with your Adoption Minnesota counselor, who will coordinate this plan with your hospital of choice. Much like your adoption plan,  you have full control over your hospital stay. You get to decide if and how much time you want to spend with your baby and if and when you want the adoptive family to come to the hospital.

  1. Complete the Legal Steps to finalize the adoption plan.

Once your baby is born your Adoption Minnesota counselor and your adoption attorney will make sure you understand your rights and the legal aspects of finalizing the adoption.  They will make sure you’re comfortable with your decision before proceeding with the paperwork that gives your consent to the adoption, allowing the adoption to become final.

  1. After placement of your baby for adoption and ongoing contact:

Placing your child for adoption is just the beginning. Rather than “goodbye,” birth parents have the option to have openness and ongoing communication and visits after placement with their child and the adoptive family.

It is up to you to decide what kind of relationship you want to have with your child and the adoptive family after the adoption. Just as you get to decide how to “give up” your baby for adoption, you get to decide how you want your open adoption to look after placement.

  • Typically, women receive updates and photos of their child for 18 years.
  • Many also stay in contact with the adoptive family through emails, phone calls, text messages and social media updates.
  • Some plan in person visits once per year or more.

Adoption Minnesota hopes that this information was helpful. If you have any questions or want to learn more. Please reach out to us at www.adoptionmn.com or call at 612-333-0593!

Pregnant Considering Adoption

unplanned pregnancy support minnesota

If you are pregnant considering adoption you may want to ask yourself, do I have:

  • A dedicated social worker who will meet you in person in a location of your choice
  • A worker located in MN
  • A worker who will help you find a doctor in your area if you need
  • An adoption worker who will come to the hospital and help you through that difficult time
  • An adoption worker who is only working and supporting you through this process and not the adoptive parents as well
  • post adoption support
  • support groups that you can attend

If not, you may be working with a facilitator and not an adoption agency. Adoption Minnesota is a local agency in Minnesota that makes sure that their clients have someone to meet with in person, who is willing to come to them anywhere in MN. We walk birth parents through the process step by step and help them to create an adoption plan that fits their needs and wants for their child.

Adoption Minnesota’s Birth Mother Video

 

Click the photo to watch Adoption Minnesota‘s new video for birth mothers. If you or someone you know wants more information on adoption services and what the adoption process looks like have them reach out to Adoption Minnesota at 612-333-0593, or by text at 612-616-4564. We are here to help birth parents through this incredibly hard time. We provide counseling, help putting baby up for adoption and creating a plan for openness. We provide support and counseling after the placement and can refer them to other support groups too!

Pregnant and considering adoption?

Are Pregnant and Considering Adoption?

Adoption Minnesota is a licensed adoption agency in Minnesota. We work with women who are pregnant and considering adoption. We encourage you to make all the key decisions about your pregnancy, your baby, and your adoption. We are there to help you during the pregnancy, birth and for as long after the adoption as you want.

Adoption Minnesota wants you to know that if you are pregnant and considering adoption, we are here to support you through this process. If you would like to learn more about how we can help either fill out an info form or call us at 612-333-0593.

Who can adopt my baby?

Who can adopt my baby?

Many women who are looking into placing their baby for adoption may be thinking, “How will I find the right family to adopt my baby, or who is out there to adopt my baby.” Adoption Minnesota is here to help! We have families who, will adopt your baby, who have been home study approved and are ready to adopt. Find our families at https://adoptionmn.com/waiting-families/

Adoption Minnesota is here to help you through the process of finding the right family for you and your baby. We can help facilitate meeting families that you are interested in, and create an adoption plan, including what kind of openness you want with your child and the family after the adoption is final.

Just know that if you are thinking, “Who can adopt my baby” Adoption Minnesota is here to help. If you want to talk about the process or have questions please reach out either through our website www.adoptionmn.com or call us at 612-333-0593.

You Are Not “Giving Up” by Choosing Adoption

You Are Not “Giving Up” by Choosing Adoption

You Are Choosing the Best Life Possible for Your Baby

Giving a baby up for adoption isn’t giving up! In the very least it is giving life. Birth mothers have thought long and hard about their adoption plans, they sometimes spend months planning how the adoption will go. They are just trying to choose the best life for their child. It takes an incredible amount of courage to say that you might not be what is best and that you want more for your child then what you can give them right now.

The term “giving up” can be read on websites, heard on TV shows and even be said in causal conversation among friends, but that doesn’t make the term correct. In reality women who create an adoption plan do not “give up” anything, if anything they give.

Birth mothers are making an adoption plan to give their children everything they want for them and may not be able to give them themselves. They give them adoptive families, love, stability, opportunities and much more. Nothing about an adoption plan is giving up.

Adoption has also changed so much through the years. Women no longer are forced to give up their children if they are young, single parents like they were in the past. With an open adoption birth mothers get to choose a family, decide how their adoption will go and also have visits and updates through out the years. They are not giving up, but getting to be in their children’s lives.

Adoption Minnesota wants women to know that it is not giving up in any way. It is making a plan for a child that hopefully is best for them and also for you. If you have any questions about the process or adoption please contact us at 612-333-0593 or info@adoptionmn.com.

The Hospital Experience: Things to Remember

Remember: The Birth Mother is the hospital’s patient. You are a guest of the birth mother, not the hospital’s client. Their concern is the health and well-being of the birth mother and the baby, not the comfort and needs of her guests.

Respect hospital policy–be flexible! Hospital policies regarding adoption can be different at every hospital. Everything from your access to the baby and his/her physician, to the hospital’s discharge policy may be evolving. Stay flexible and calm–Wellspring’s staff will be there to help.

Express concern, interest and care directly to the Birth Parent. Talk to the birth mother when you are in her presence. Include her in your attention. Don’t just look at and talk to the baby.

Let the Birth Mother retain control of the baby in your presence. Let the birth mother hand you the baby; don’t take the baby out of her arms. Similarly, stay in the background while the birth mother has as much time as she wants with the baby.

Don’t bring your family and friends to the hospital, unless the Birth Mother has met and invited them. The hospital is not the place to introduce your family and friends to the baby. The hospital patient is the birth mother. Her friends and family will be visiting; this may be their only chance to see the child. Consider the highly emotional state of the birth mother, and don’t intrude and possibly upset the birth mother with unfamiliar faces.

Try to take one day, one hour, at a time. This is an exciting, highly emotional time. But it is in your best interest to try and sustain a little emotional distance until arrangements are finalized.

If the Birth Mother chooses to participate in the transfer, let her be proactive. Wait for the birth mother to give you the baby. Don’t take the baby away from her. Similarly, let the birth mother be the first to leave the room or drive away after the transfer is completed. It is important for her healing process that she not have an image of the baby being taken from her.

Talk to the Birth Mother about what she wants you to do during labor and delivery. Think about your comfort level. Don’t agree to participate in a way that makes you uncomfortable. In turn, don’t urge the birth mother to include you in any way that makes her uncomfortable.

Ready your support system. Awaiting a baby’s birth is never easy. Let your friends and family know how they can help you–emotionally and logistically. Let them know you’ll need support over the telephone –but not at the hospital–once the big day arrives

Each Birth Parent is unique. There is no way to know how the birth mother will react to the birth experience, what support she will seek, how she will emotionally and physically respond to delivery and the hormonal shift that follows delivery.

Emotions surrounding birth are some of life’s most intense. Be prepared to see the birth mother display extremely strong emotions. Any emotion from deep sadness to withdrawal can surface at any time from labor through the transfer. This is normal.

The Birth Mother will experience dramatic emotional shifts. Within the first 48 hours following birth, the birth mother will live on an emotional and physical roller coaster. She will experience labor and delivery, hormonal shift, physical recovery and the initial stages of detachment. Exhaustion, adrenaline and fluctuating hormones can bring powerful emotional shifts. This is normal.

Expect surprises. No matter how well you and the birth mother have planned for the hospital, or how good your communication is, expect pre-made plans to change. Nothing can really prepare the birth mother for what she will experience during and after the birth. As her emotions fluctuate, so will her needs. This is to be expected.

Birth Parents must say “hello” “see you later” and “good-bye.” Birth parents may need time alone with the baby to realistically come to terms with their decision to place the child with the adoptive family. The hospital provides the best time and place for them to begin to face and accept their decision. Don’t automatically fear the private time between the birth parents and the baby.

Think of the first 48 hours as belonging to the Birth Mother. In most cases, the birth mother feels very deeply about the child. Frequently, she perceives that she has the first 48 hours, and the adoptive parents have the rest of the child’s life. Don’t misinterpret a lack of willingness to include adoptive parents in the hospital time as “having second thoughts.”

The Birth Parents’ families and friends may be protective of the Birth Mother. The frustration of not being able to alleviate the emotional distress of the birth mother may translate into unhappiness or coldness toward all those involved in the situation, including the adoptive parents.

The hospital’s personnel will focus concerns on the Birth Mother. Regardless of the hospital’s policies regarding independent adoption, employees are individuals who may have a wide range of feelings toward adoption. For some staff members, independent adoption may be a totally alien practice. Remember, you’re dealing with individuals and their reactions may not reflect hospital policy. As always, call on the Wellspring staff if the need arises.

Be prepared for your own emotions as you separate from the Birth Mother after the transfer. After weeks or perhaps months of working together with your birth mother toward the common goal of a healthy birth, it may be very challenging to emotionally separate from her after your child’s transfer. Conflicting emotions that have arisen from time to time during the pregnancy may set as the birth becomes imminent. This insecurity is normal and is frequently experienced by birth parents as well as adoptive parents.

Adoption Minnesota is on the Documentary 9 Months by Courtney Cox

Adoption MN has been a part of a documentary that is currently being presented on Facebook Live. This opportunity came to us through local birth parents who had already committed to the production of Nine Months by Courtney Cox during the beginning of the birth mother’s pregnancy.

 

Nine Months follows several different people around the country who have pregnancy situations that involve surrogacy, infertility struggles, a single parent, cancer during pregnancy, etc., all during their nine months of pregnancy. If you are thinking about placing your baby for adoption this may be a helpful documentary to show how the process goes for birth parents.

 

The story that Adoption MN is involved in is the only adoption situation. It follows the birth parents’ pregnancy, adoption choice, how they chose a family, the hospital experience and afterwards.

 

You can watch Nine months by either clicking on the link below or logging into Facebook and clicking on the “watch” tab, then searching for Nine months by Courtney Cox.Several of us have watched the episodes shown so far, and we feel that, for the most part, they have been positive and give a sense of what the “real life” process of planning an adoptive placement looks like. However, we do see how edited the story is and not everything shown is completely accurate.

 

Overall, the show portrays quite a variety of pregnancy related issues, struggles and the desire for and joy of becoming parents. We encourage you to view this series.

https://www.facebook.com/9monthswithcourteneycox

 

10 things birth mothers think about

There are 10 things birth mothers think about, wish for, and hopes for when placing their child for adoption. If you are in an open adoption, you may have heard some already, if not, they are important to know. They are:

I did not place my child because they were unwanted. I wanted them so much that I continued a pregnancy filled with unanswered questions.

I chose adoption because I loved my child. This parental love allowed me to put their needs before my own when making my choice.

This choice affected more than just me. They has a grandmother, a grandfather, and aunts and uncles who love them as well, and they will be missed.

I wish for the day I can look into my child’s eyes and tell them I love them one more time.

I hope that you will teach my child about their beginnings, about where they was born and who I am.

I hope you will teach respect to my child by showing respect for me in your discussions.

I wish I could be there to answer my child’s questions about adoption, but I trust you to answer them truthfully as best you can.

I will never stop thinking about my child. They will always be a part of who I am.

I would never try to disrupt my child’s new family with you. I put too much emotion and suffering into making this choice to allow anything to disrupt it, including me.

In my eyes, you will always be my child’s parents. And that thought brings me happiness.