unplanned pregnancy help, newborn adoption, putting up baby for adoption
May 8, 2019 In Birthmother Stories, Uncategorized, Unplanned Pregnancy By CAIRS

Malia’s Story

“If you would have asked me about adoption before I was pregnant I would have said that I could never go through with it.  Now that I have I can’t imagine what my life would have been if I hadn’t!

I was fifteen and a sophomore in high school when I found out that I was pregnant. I had just played in a basketball game and came home feeling horrible. I went to the doctor the next day and was told the surprising news that I was pregnant. I didn’t believe my doctor at first. How could this have happened? Not to me! My boyfriend at the time was also in high school, and both of us knew that we were not ready to parent. I wanted to finish school and go to college. I was too far along in my pregnancy to get an abortion, so we knew that adoption was the right choice.

My mom helped me find an adoption agency and set up a meeting for an adoption worker to come to our house. I was so nervous! I thought that it would be some old woman who would tell me what I needed to do. I could not have been more wrong. The worker came and made me feel comfortable right away. She told me that I got a lot of choices through this process. She told me that I got to choose the family, decide how I wanted the adoption to go, and also have contact after placing.

My boyfriend and I went through the book of families. We chose one to meet with. They came to our house to meet because we thought that would be easiest for us. Everyone was so nervous at our first meeting, but after they left, we both said that they were the ones. We asked them to meet us again and we told them in person that we were choosing them. Everyone was crying and hugging. It felt really good.

When it came time to deliver, the family was in the waiting room. We wanted them to meet their daughter as soon as she was born. They had a separate room at the hospital and it was nice to have some time with them and our baby and also some time alone with her. When we all left the hospital, there were more tears, but they were good tears. We had all been through so much together and truly cared for each other. Even though it was extremely hard, we knew that we would be seeing each other and be in each other’s lives forever. That made it a little easier.

Since placing, I have seen my daughter a few times a year. It has been really amazing having her in my life. She got to come to one of my basketball games and meet my team. It was so incredible to see her cheering in the stands. If you had asked me about adoption before I was pregnant I would have said that I could never go through with it.  Now that I have I can’t imagine what my life would have been if I hadn’t!

 

May 8, 2019 In Birth Parents, Birthmother Stories, Uncategorized, Unplanned Pregnancy By CAIRS

Laura’s Story

“I know her adoptive family will love her unconditionally and give her opportunities I never could have provided. I feel at peace with my decision.”

When I first found out I was pregnant, I was in the middle of my senior year of college. My boyfriend and I had been together for almost two years, but we both knew we were in no place to raise a child. I really didn’t have any idea how to begin the adoption process, but I decided just to email a counselor at Adoption Minnesota.

Beginning with the very first email, I knew this was the agency I wanted to work with. Eventually, we scheduled an appointment to get the ball rolling. My counselor was absolutely nothing but wonderful from step one. She gave me all the information I ever could have needed, everything from explaining my rights as a birthmother to helping me find a doctor. She was incredibly available to help in any way, or just to chat. But most importantly, she always made me feel like I was making a good decision.

Then came the difficult part; choosing an adoptive family. I spent a lot of time looking through Adoption Minnesota’s book of potential families. Each family had such a touching story, and I felt like each completely deserved to get a baby! Eventually, I developed a gut feeling about one family. I scheduled a meeting with them and walked away knowing they were the perfect choice. From there, the counselors at Adoption Minnesota helped us hammer out all the details. Together, we decided everything from when the adoptive parents would come to the hospital to how often I wanted letters and pictures after they took my baby home. My counselor always reinforced that I was in control of the situation and I could choose exactly how I wanted everything to go.

The adoptive parents and I emailed almost every day from that point on. We even met a few times for coffee. I loved getting to know them better, which only solidified that I had made the right choice. Finally, the day came to go to the hospital! The experience was the most amazing of my entire life. At one point during the day after my daughter was born, my counselor, the adoptive parents, my boyfriend, my baby and I were all in one room together. It truly felt like we were all one family. When you decide to give up your baby for adoption, you can’t help but feel completely guilty. However, I knew that if I was going to bring a new little person into the world, she deserved to have the best life I could possibly give her. Giving her to an adoptive family was the way for me to accomplish this. I’ve never loved anything like I love my daughter. However, I know her adoptive family will love her unconditionally and give her opportunities I never could have provided. I feel at peace with my decision. I never would have gotten through everything without the love and support of my boyfriend, the adoptive parents, and most importantly, my counselor at Adoption Minnesota.